“The dark window frame is a metaphor. Fear and pain can hold us back from stepping into the sunshine and moving forward with our lives.”
Amanda Young is currently studying MA Illustration, her visual language aims to make a visceral connection with the viewer via mental health themes in her own life. @amandayoungart (Instagram)
In Hindsight the World Is a Different Place Fiction by Joyce Bingham
CW: Violence, Miscarriage
In hindsight I should have stayed at home, nursed my stomach cramps, watched daytime television, and sobbed.
In hindsight I should have seated them at a table in the back, not at the front, the one we have to advertise our clientele and food in full view of the street.
In hindsight I should have been making their drinks behind the counter, preparing their cutlery and napkins, but I was chatting to them, entranced by the cuteness of their baby girl.
In hindsight I should have been in the staff toilet mourning the loss of my pregnancy, but I was standing in the direct line of fire at the window.
In hindsight I should have known that the metal tray I carried was light aluminium and was not going to stop a bullet.
In hindsight I should have known that shielding the baby from gunfire was going to destroy any chance I had in the future of bearing children.
In hindsight I should have understood the silence after the gunfire was simply my eardrums reacting to the violent noise.
In hindsight I should have realised the baby girl I saved would light up my life in ways I never expected.
In hindsight I would do it again.
Joyce Bingham is a Scottish writer who enjoys writing short fiction with pieces published by Ellipsis Zine, FlashBack Fiction, VirtualZine, Funny Pearlsand Free Flash Fiction. She lives in the North of England where she makes up stories and tells tall tales. @JoyceBingham10 (Twitter)